What the heck!?!

Ok.. so yesterday I wasn't home a whole lot.. I worked for about 10 hours yesterday. I came home for a few hours between shifts and literally watch Logan go from a standing position.. to jumping on too the couch, bounce his head off the wooden arm of the futon and begin bawling.. I'm telling you the terminal velocity that this kid hit the couch had to be faster then a 900 pound gorilla falling from the top of a building. By the time I got to him, his face was already swollen and bleeding.. and his eye was turning black. This little boy looked like he got into a fisticuffs with Rocky! 

oh sweet eye candy om nom nom!

ok,, so I may have exaggerated a little.. but it looked really bad before we got it cleaned up.

But he really did smash his face really hard on the couch.. that picture is after it had been cleaned up and the swelling had gone down quite a bit. Clumsy little boy. 

So.. weird things I've heard said around my house.

Charlotte "Logan!! I found your favorite man toy!!" o.O WHAT DOES THAT MEAN!?!?! 

Adrianna "These noodles are good, but I hope they don't give me butt gas." HAHA BUTT GAS?!?

Charlotte "mommy!! Dri dri hit me in the head with her purse.. You know I have a brain in there right??" hmm well.. lol 

Charlotte "thats why I don't like chicken, cuz sometimes I forget to chew a little" HAHA That about sums up her everything.... 

Dave ""you can't do a lot of swashbuckling with poop in your pants"

Logan "Tristan hatched eggs on the floor!!!"

ME! "Embrace the lost voices and kneel before the doorway of hairy unibrows... Pirates and elderberries!!!!!!!!!!"

Me "And lo, it came to pass.. Macho man did indeed prevent the rapture!! OOOOH YEEEEAAA!!! :)"

Anyway.. I think that's all I have for today.. so far the kids have been pretty chill.. Adrianna and Charlotte have been both playing seperate DS games and the boys are addicted to the baby crack that is yo gabba gabba... Dave is taking a nap and I gotta get ready for work. I leave you with these images of awesome! 

haha 

It's true.. until they realize they can never win ^_~ i got mad skills yo! 

DO I LOOK LIKE I HAVE A DENTIST BITCH! NO! muhahahaha 

P.S I work customer service at a local grocery store here in Missouri.. yesterday I had a really weird woman walk up to me and stare at me rudely while giving me angry responses to every question I asked her.. And me being so stupid kept trying to get her to smile or laugh.. and then she all out of the blue asks me if I have a dentist.. WTF?!? I was all.. you're total today is 15.64 please... and she's like.. Do you have a dentist? I need a dentist. Do you know where any of them are? O.o I was so confused 

What a day..hell what a week..

So..the kids came home from school on Friday and announced.. SPRING BREAK!! SPRING BREAK!! OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOZ!!! Are you serious?! How do I forget such an important thing as spring break.. I am SO not prepared for this! I work full time, and Dave works thirds.. this is gonna be a HORRIBLE TERRIBLE NO GOOD VERY BAD WEEK!! lol

 Lets see.. strange happenings of this week so far include.. Charlotte deciding that she wants to have a play date with her friend from school. And in her little kindergarten mind.. getting on her friends school bus and going to her house was a much better plan than waiting for me and Dave to get around to calling her friend and making plans ourselves..First of all. How the heck does the school just allow a kid to get on the wrong bus with out permission, is beyond me. Luckily her friends dad isn't an asshole and told the bus driver that she wasn't supposed to be getting off on this bus or stop and that she didn't have permission to be here. That was strike one on the school. Strike TWO is the fact that when Dave realized that our daughter wasn't on the bus.. he called up at the school. THEY ALREADY KNEW! They were well aware that Charlotte had gotten on the wrong bus and was sending her home as they spoke, but nobody thought it important enough to call either one of us to let us know that our daughter wasn't lost or stolen.. just misplaced :P Not to mention.. what would have happened if nobody spoke up for poor Charlotte and told anyone she wasn't supposed to be on the bus..A poor little kindergarten girl would have been left standing on the street crying with nobody around to help her. WTF! So pissed off about it!

Not Charlie.. but exactly how she would have felt.

How he must see himself

And then we have Tristan.. This little monster.. twice now has gotten up WAY before anyone else in the house.. and silently destroys the world. Yesterday he tried to OD on the ONLY medicine we had in the house that didn't have a child proof cap on it. We thought that having it up on the TOP of the medicine cabinet would be safe.. but no, this little kid decided to grab a chair out of the dining room.. climb on that to get up to the sink.. stand on top of the counter to reach for the medicine. Luckily he only got into a few of them, and according to poison control.. Claritin was the least dangerous of pills he could take.. JEEZ kid
AND then this morning this miniature Odin son decides to scale my dresser.. while we were sleeping!! He pulled out all the shelves like stairs and climbed up the thing until either 1. He reached what he was trying to get up to.. the tennis balls or 2. he pulled out one of the drawers making the dresser sway a little and the tennis balls fell down... if this boy lives to be 3 it'll be a miracle.

Today was an amazingly beautiful day.. high in the 80's no clouds, nice breeze..So I decided to go outside and work on what someday I hope to call a nice backyard with a garden.. right now.. it's a weed infested zero grassed mess full of tree saplings and ivy..UGH!!! Dri decides that she wants to help me.. yay awesome.. until 5 mins into it when she's complaining that it's too hot outside, and she's tired.. and every few mins she wants me to stop what i'm doing so that she can try it, then gives up on that and moves on too the next silly task she makes up in her head lol! Needless to say I was tired of watching her run around being weird before I had even really gotten started. But I actually got about 5 bags of leaves and ivy cleaned up. .tilled a nice little spot for the beginning of our garden, and now just need to find the time to get all the roots of the damned little saplings pulled up and I can start planting a few things YAY!!! So anyway.. in the process of Dave and I working outside.. Adrianna decides that worms are her new best friends, and she's running around grabbing all the worms she can find and digging holes in our yard to bury them so they are safe from ants.. and Logan.. poor little guy..tries to be a world class stuntman and rides his tricycle as fast as he can.. off the steps out front of our house.. needless to say that didn't end well for him. So we run and scoop up the now defeated 4 year snotty faced little boy and carry him into the once clean living room.. now destroyed beyond recognition, since we stupidly left a 2 year old and 6 year old alone for 10 mins watching tv. Later we found an ENTIRE box of strawberries nommed on by the two of them in the boys closet.. crafty little buggers! Anyway.. a few tears later and Logan pointing to everyone all the booboo's he had gotten from falling off his bike.. and all is well, he is no longer wailing about how bad he's hurt and has forgotten all about it.

Meanwhile it is getting really late and now neither Dave or I feel like cooking dinner.. so we decide to do what every lazy American family decides to do.. order pizza! YAY! It was delish..and only now am I slightly regretting that decision while I sit in a silent living room typing these stories out to anyone who cares to read it.. listening to the quiet snoring of four sleeping children.. with the occasional fart escaping from the bowels of the dark rooms LOL! ok..so i'm not really regretting it..Farts are HILARIOUS! They're even funnier when they come from slumbering babies.. a whole evening of laughter is set before me.. because every once in a while I hear... FFPPPRRRTTERRTT come out of the room.. HAHA! awesome..









So lets see.. other things that have been happening in this house.. OH Dave picked up the new street fighter X tekken.. which is a fun game to play.. especially since Tristan is learning a whole new set of moves to attack everyone in the house with. This kid sits and studies Dave playing and will mimic ever move he thinks is cool until he feels that he's perfected it.. and then tries it out on his older sisters and brother. No joke.. and he's good!! I watched him earlier today pull off a damn near perfect atomic buster on his oldest sister Adrianna. She has at least 30 pounds on this boy.. and 6 years in age.. yet she fell like a twig when he grabbed her.

The other night he was really cute, while trying to get out of bed time.. he comes creeping into the living room.. and says all excited.. MOMMY MOMMY I FOUND A MAGIC CRYSTAL!! and hands me a crystal.. he said that the monster left it in his room, and that they were trying to get him to go with them.. but he beat the monsters up and told them they had to go! They had left the crystal with him in case he ever decides to go with them.. hmm.. maybe I'll summon them and hand them all off!! WOO!


anyway.. that's all I have to report for now.. wish us luck as we continue thru this journey of chaos! 

heck yea! it'll go awesomely with my wallet.. and shoes! I heart accessorizing  

OF COURSE WE DO!!! 

no worries.. I'm disappointed but not pissed off.. I heart capsule toys only 100 yen! 

yay!!! I wanna see act two! did he save the princess? did he avenge his father? what happens next?!

epic video's are epic.. :)

Bleck.. working sucks. Useful for buying things, and paying bills.. but definatly sucks.. I didn't even see my girls at all today. I slept thru them getting ready for school, and was at work before they got home. Baby Thor has decided that he wants to go thru the terrible two's and is now making things so much weirder and crazy around here. I woke up this morning to him sneaking into the fridge and eating cheese sticks.. When I got up, I discovered that every single toy that was in the two toy boxes in his room had been taken out and thrown all around the ENTIRE house YAY! stepping on a toy car sucks lots when you're half asleep :P ANYWAY! Since I didn't really have a whole lot of time at home today to see my babies.. again. I thought I'd share some more video's that made me laugh.

This guy.. cracks me the fuck up! Seriously what was he thinking? I wish I could be inside his head. I watched this video like 20 times the first time I saw it. SO FUNNY!!!! 

Ok.. so since Street fighter X Tekken came out today.. I felt it fitting to show you a few of my favorite Guile theme goes with everything video. It's true. The guile theme really does make EVERYTHING just a little bit more epic. Check these video's out.

YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!

See! this clip of 300 was a very awesome scene.. but yet its made all the more epic when Guile's theme gets thrown in the mix! So much better!!

 

Whats more awesome than a bunch of old men probably drunk, in a field dancing...? A BUNCH OF OLD MEN PROBABLY DRUNK, IN A FIELD DANCING TO THE GUILE THEME I SAY! These guys are fucking fantastic now! lol!

this guy.. totally showed that copy machine who's boss, cept it was the printer that prematurly ejaculated on him.....

ahh good old Leroy Jenkins..

Ok, enough about Guile's theme. Here is a classic video for you nerd lovers :) Enjoy!

Seems like a good time to show you this video.. I still quote this shit today ^_^ So funny! I know that I am a HUGE nerd.. but this is going way to far lol

even reno 911 agree's that this shit is worth noting and laughing at ^_~ that means its for seriously funny!

Anyway.. enough of this, I need to get to sleep since the kids seem to like to get me up now at 430 am.. please enjoy this image of David Bowie's epic jiggle pants :) 

best video's ever!! a compilation, by me!

So, my entire day was basically uneventful with kids, since I worked all day and when I got home they ate dinner and went to bed. So I thought I'd share some of my favorite videos and images with you ^___^ I hope you enjoy them!


This gem is a tv show Dave and I discovered years ago. It is a group of Japanese comedians getting schooled. They are put in school where everything is fucked up and hilarious, and whenever they crack a smile or start laughing.. masked men come in and beat them in the ass with a bamboo sword.. The best part about it is watching these grown adults try not to bust up laughing:)

This next video is from the same show, but it is by far my favorite clip.. The man looks so stupid as he's counting. ten ten one.. ten ten two.. ten ten three.. ten ten ten ten ten ten ten ten ten ten.. Hahaha! I personally know that if I were on this show.. I would so fail. I wouldn't be able to sit down.

then you have this guy.. what exactly makes you decide to dress yourself in your grandma's diaper.. stuff it with bills and pose. I understand it not, but sure am glad someone found it and posted it on the wonderful interwebs.. aren't you? 

I'm sexy and I know it! 

this picture requires no words.. its just epic and awesome:)

this guy.. where to even start. He is so wonderfully serious. Fantastic and shaved. Rocking the mullet like a champ and not afraid to wear his undies outside his spandex! Wonderful specimen of WTF if ever I've seen one :)

I seriously want this bike! I would ride it everywhere!! who wouldn't want to ride around on a pink fuzzy maned unicorn bicycle.. It's like rainbow bright and Lance Armstrong got together, nommed some acid and came up with this brilliant plan to take over the world. BEAUTIFUL!

unicorns are fucking gangster! 

There is so much going on in this photo that is just weird that I don't even know where to start.. like.. what the fuck is that giant red eyed muppet blob thing in the tub.. it looks like Jabba the hut had sex with Rolf from the muppets and created this spawn of the devil. and then.. this woman and baby are fully clothed in the bathtub with a pink rifle?? I guess if the zombie apocalypse is happening.. you gotta protect yourself.. and how fantastic is it that you can even color coordinate while doing so! yay! 

Let me introduce you to Jan Terri.. she is the epitome of wonderfully horrible music. You just gotta watch it to understand the greatness of it all :)

This video is amazing. I want to fuck with people and make them think they are invisible! Pretty please make that possible for me!!!

anyway, that's all I have for now.. I hope you enjoyed the wacky things this 8-bit mom looks up when the kids are asleep and I'm bored ^____^;;;

Typical Saturday morning..

      Alright.. so to begin talking about our morning here.. I need to start out with my Friday night.. We are so full of awesome here in this family that after the kids went to bed Dave and I sat down and watched Attack of the Killer tomatoes 2.. with our delish bag of M&M's and promptly fell asleep... YAY!!! Two grown adults sleeping on a couch sucks big time ^_^;; I woke up at around.. 4:30 this morning to all four kids surrounding us in the silent attempt to steal the bag of candy from it's resting place.. promptly told the girls that they needed to clean their rooms as punishment for sneaking food, and that until the bedroom was vacuumed they didn't get to eat. 5 hours later..  after many cries out that we are torturing them, that we would rather they die than feed them.. meanest parents ever yadiyadiyadi...the bedroom was cleaned and they finally got breakfast lol.


       Meanwhile, Tristan at some point during the morning/evening before had gotten up on a chair and fiddled with our alarm system for reasons unknownst to anyone but the mind of a two year old. He somehow managed to set and arm the alarm. So this morning at like 7:30am when Dave was going to head up to 7-11 to grab some things the alarm goes off, and it's loud.. I mean LOUD! The entire neighborhood can hear this thing going off at the butt crack of dawn...and of course, our landlord hasn't told us how to disarm the fucking thing. So here we are.. with an alarm blaring in the attic, and also a separate one in the basement.. chiming almost as loud as a tornado siren with no way to shut it off. A quick phone call made and the alarm was disarmed, but that was after of course everyone and his mom had come outside to see what was happening. Luckily, it wasn't set to call the cops at the time. That would have been super fun.

 Now here we are, it's 10 o'clock the boys are eating snacks, the girls are pretty much finishing breakfast and Dave is fiddling on the computer.. all of a sudden this music starts playing.. it sounds like metal from the 1980's I'm talking thrash/power metal.. complete with echo chamber vocals for effect.. I felt like I had stepped into a time machine.. The kids.. on cue start moshing around the house and acting like fools.. at one point.. I honestly had to say to Tristan.. HEY! Stop sticking that spoon in your diaper and don't hit your brother with vacuum attachment's!!! I told you.. Glorious chaos! Logan is sitting upside down in his spider-man thrown.. Tristan decided to take off all his clothes and diaper.. and is tearing thru the house screaming NAKED BABABOOM! while flashing everyone who looks his way.. and I'm on my way to work ^_^;; wish Dave luck.. I believe he may need it today lol! Oh hey.. since today's descriptions are completely image free I thought I would leave you with this picture of a man wearing terribly fancy pants :) I hope you enjoy!!

     

Strangest threat ever....

     So.. Logan aka Spider-man, was being esspecially clingy to me. He is quiet the mommy's boy, and started throwing a major fit when I tried to get a few minutes peace... So, I threatened him.. by telling him that if he didn't knock off the Emo act I was going to take him to McDonald's.. he started cracking up and told me that we wouldn't go eat that, cuz it's dikusting mommy!!! Weird huh? How many four year old's do you know who will turn down McDonald's? I only know of four kids on the face of the planet who have ever willingly turned it down.. and that's my kids.. Lot's of reason's really, none that i'm going to get into right now.. but I still think it was a pretty funny threat.

    On a side note, Adrianna came home from school today, and has so far swept the kitchen, unloaded/reloaded the dishwasher, cleaned and vaccummed the living room and started a load of laundry. She also folded a basket of laundry and put it away. YAY! She also mentioned that once her maid grounding is over she plans on continuing the cleaning up the house habit that she's starting to form, because she is begining to realize how much we do around here... HOLY CRAP?!? Who's kid is this? Are you telling me we came up with a grounding that actually taught her a lesson?!? It may seem cruel but hell it's working! And it's more legal than Duct taping her to a wall and throwing tomato's at her :P (no, I haven't done such things.. but man it's tempting haha)

 Oh! Have you ever seen Yo Gabba Gabba? If you don't have kids of your own, then I forgive you.. but this show is like crack for kids.. We put it on and all four of them are chill, staring happily at a giant red herpe infested monster, an emo stripped monster, a flower child, robot and dragon kitty thing.. while a skinny black man in tights control's the world like a giant orange puppet master.. here is a sample..it also has biz markie teaching kids how to beat box and a cracked out guy from Devo who draws crazy pictures in a very creepy manner. Best kid's show ever! Here is what the kids are screaming as we speak.. even though the show isn't even on... 

 




Today Dri came home from school, talking about this creepy notes written in chalk by the bus stop every day she gets home.. it has her's and a few of her friends names on it, than says watch out.. yesterday it said You're next.. Reaaaal weird.. I'm sure it's just another little kid fucking with them, but I may start meeting her at the bus stop for the next few days.. just to be sure^_^;;; Ahh well.. I guess that's all she wrote for now.. check back later too see what other zany things are going on in the land of us! I leave you with this image of a ninja llama.. cuz as you know, I heart llama!!!!!!

   

Strangely quiet today...

    Well.. as fate may have it, I start a blog about how weird my family is, and today they are chill. We shall give it some time, I'm sure the weird will expose its miss shaped head soon enough. So this post is gonna be a little more focused on my own inner weird. I enjoy watching anime, and playing video games.. hence the 8-bit mommy title.. I also enjoy watching shitty movies. Last night we watched a movie called blubberella... it's a movie about a half woman, half vampire... gigantic mess lol worst movie ever! which made it pretty awesome! It was riddled with fat jokes made by the overweight vampire who spends her days slaughtering Nazi's for fun.. and to take the food they are eating away. Not much more to say on that really. It was pretty bad.

   I live in a super old house, almost 100 years old.. and is crooked as hell! No seriously.. you can put a ball down in the kitchen and watch it quickly roll down to the other side.. all our wall scrolls hang at a slant due to gravity working and sometimes you will lose your balance due to the crookedity of the whole thing ^_^; lots of fun. My kids swear the house is haunted.. and at times I believe them. One day I had my friend over.. and a remote controlled car decided to turn itself on and drive off our desk, almost hitting her in the head.. the control was sitting next to the car and the kids were all asleep. Other things happen a bit too, lights flicker.. one night after I locked the back door.. it flew open not once but twice! That fucked me up, since Dave was at work at the time. Oh yea, and than the spooky attic door opened up after the back door flew open. The second time the door flew open the cat darted outside. I called Dave, and although he insisted that I go and search for our kitty.. I let him know that if the wind zombies outside wanted her so badly that they opened our back door twice while howling.. they could definitely keep her. OH and by the way, she came back.. but not through the outside doors like one would expect. I found her later down in the basement, leading me to believe that maybe.. just maybe I have a secret tunnel underneath my house, and inside that tunnel is a stream of ooze that is the source of all our weird. Because.. everyone who steps into our house.. leaves just a little bit stranger than when they came in. And that can't be our fault.. has to be the stream.. me thinks! I shall search for it one day!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! (that's the scream from the headless fuck chargers!)

     AHHH -sigh of relief- I knew the weird wouldn't hold out for too long. Right now as I type this.. my boys are pretending they have bombs on their hands and are charging at me full tilt expecting me too shoot them with my finger guns.. just like the fuck chargers in serious Sam.. a game that Dave is playing right this second..

And they said aqua-man had no talents.. 

      Well then, a few bruises later and Logan getting punched in the head a few times by the baby Thor, and all is peaceful again in the house. Later.. when the girls get home from school, that's when the glorious chaos begins. Anywho, I have nothing else to report, so I will leave you with this perplexing image of a man reading underwater.. and an extremely erotic cup of Ramen noodles..                              

not even sure what can be said about this..but I can almost guarantee that when the cup gets hot.. the clothes come off lol!

                                                                                  

     

And so it begins, brief description of glorious chaos...

    So.. I decided to start a blog. Not because I have anything super amazing to say, but because I have 4 kids who are absolutely insane. If I don't talk about it, I'll explode!!! ^_^; They are eight, six, four, and two. Lights of my life but, if you're a parent you understand when I say.. OMFG!

    Right now my oldest, Adrianna is grounded. She has been grounded for over a week. She talked back to her dad and turned a simple grounding into something way blown out of proportion. We let her relax during one day when I had a friend come over, and of course she took full advantage of it. But then the next day when she started acting up again, she had the nerve to tell her dad and I both that our punishments are stupid and that they don't teach her a lesson because we aren't hard enough on her. (in a smart ass manner btw) so now.. We have our own personal slave! YAY!!! I personally took it upon myself to let her see what it's like to be mommy and daddy for a week. She's gotten to clean up her brothers room, her own room, sweep the kitchen and unload/load the dishes all this week. Once we get it to a neutral clean, she's gonna learn how to do laundry ^_~  Oh yea she also gets to get bedtime all ready, pajama's for everyone.. toothpaste on toothbrushes, brushing hair.. It's been real nice. And since she's 8 her mouth is constantly getting her into trouble. So her one week personal maid grounding has continually reset itself a few times already.. We are now going on week two YAY! A mom could get used to this:)

Dressed for success, for her school muscial..

    My 6 year old, Charlotte is your typical princess. Always running around in a dress, flittering through the house like she has wings, and is a little gaming nerd. Right now she is jumping off our couch as high as she can while wearing her fairy wings trying to learn how to fly. She's been practicing for quite a while and I honestly believe if anyone is gonna figure out how.. It'll be her.

She found a heart shaped corn flake on Valentine's day.. 

    Logan is the 4 year old. He's your typical boy...except for his emo tendencies his beautiful long brown hair is always half hanging in his face, and any time things don't go exactly his way.. this LOOOONG loud misery ensued waaaail comes screaming out of him. When you send him into his room this long spew of 4 year old cursing streams out of his mouth. I don't mean swear words though.. he speaks in tongues.. most of the words you can make out are him bitching out whoever hurt his feelings and how he's SO MAD AT THEM. How he wants them to go away, or go to work and leave him alone! Like I said.. Emo kid! Oh, he also has an alter ego.. Spider-man! This boy will introduce himself as Spider-man before he tells you his real name. He also won't leave the house unless he has his spidey socks, underwear, and shirt on. He's also mentioned a few times that I need to find him spidey pants so he can be the real deal!

Logan, full of emo and rocking the old man hat

   And then we have Tristan, this kid.. is probably the coolest 2 year old I HAVE EVER MET! He looks just like Thor, and acts like Thor! He uses his mighty smash, be it with his hammer or his fists to destroy everything and everyone. This kid has no idea how strong he really is. Earlier today he came running up to me with his (gasp) toy gun and told me I was a bad guy.. my response was he's the bad guy, cuz Tristan is a bad word.. this little man's response to me was.. with a silly grin.. I'm not a bad word Mommy, I didn't say fuck.... That's right.. dropped the F word, just like it was normal. How did I respond you ask? I cracked up laughing to be honest. He knew it was a bad word, so I couldn't really yell at him. I told him not to say that word anymore and he went about his business hehe. Which included running up to his sister, singing full blast, HEY HEY YOU YOU I DON'T LIKE YOUR GIRLFRIEND, I THINK YOU NEED A NEW ONE! and punched her in the gut. -shake my head- all this.. happened in 5 mins.

Yep.. that's how he rolls.. gunsword in his diaper, headband of nerdlyness and  his gallon of milk.. coolest kid you'll ever meet lol

Imagine the stories I have to tell in the coming posts, it's a wild crazy ride. Everyday I have a new Oh wtf moment in this chaotic house:) We have lots of fun.. and laugh a lot. I wouldn't change it for the world.. well.. maybe a little.. A giant Lego house would be cool, with wallpaper that tasted like gumdrops.. and smelled of elder berries. Oh! And if the Goblin King made regular appearances, pointing off into the distance, saying turn back sarah.. before it's too late. Yea.. that would be awesome! Anyway.. that's all I got for now.. enjoy this picture of a kitty dressed like link.. woo!!